Getting a two-syllable DAY-UM!

You know how when some people walk into a room, you just stare and say DAY-UM!  Well, maybe. But you know what I mean. All eyes on them, because they wear their space like a tailored glove. Because they know what their audience is looking for. Do you? Know what your audience is looking for, [...]

The secret sauce for selling more stuff

“Yes! Absolutely I want to buy your flamingo-shaped sofa! I’ll do it tomorrow!” *tumbleweed*  Of course, they won’t buy it. But they seemed so enthusiastic… That potential customer disappeared like a toot in the wind, and you have no idea why. I’ll let you into a little secret: most business owners have no idea why their customers [...]

Got client cystitis?

“I am obligated to give them 16 hours a week, and to be honest I hate it! I really resent them.” So Becky, one of my Superheroes, told me during her Borrow My Brain consultation. I hear ya, sista. I’ve been there, resenting the hell out of clients. It sucks. Becky’s a personal fitness trainer [...]

There’s no such thing as creative people

Howls of protest from the artists’ corner! Red-faced rage from the engineers!  Whaddya mean there’s no such thing as creative people, you douchecanoe?! It’s true. Well, sort of. What I mean is, anyone can learn to be creative. As I explain in this week’s blast-from-the-past podcast. Due to reasons, Joe and I didn’t record a [...]

Embrace the dodo

Dodo is a funny word. The dodo is a funny bird. If it hadn’t died out,  And made us all pout, Would you know it at all? Embrace the dodo, for the rare bird is the valuable one. (Yes, I know the dodo is about as rare as you can get, but go with me [...]

Your dirty little secret laid bare

“God, I’m such an idiot.” “Why am I so crap at this?” “I’m so clumsy.”  “I’m such a muppet!” “Moron!” You’d never speak to anyone else this way, would you? So why do you think it’s okay to speak to yourself that way? Yesterday, I woke up actually thinking to myself, “I’m a fucking idiot.” [...]

You are not the cockwomble whisperer

Your eyes are on fire. Your heart is like a demented bass drum. The world swims and wavers, like an underwater dream sequence.  And you can’t quite believe what you’re hearing as a client screams insults down the phone at you. Or as you read the passive-aggressive needle-sharp jibes in the email. Or as he [...]

Like a herd of stampeding teenage bullocks

“They’re cows! Cows are friendly, don’t worry.” “Just walk calmly, there are no calves. We’ll be fine.” “Erm, guys…” We stop. We turn around. The snoozing hunks of beef are no longer snoozing. Instead, we see this… “Um. I don’t think those are cows. I think they’re young bulls.” At this point, we start walking [...]

Put some bass in your walk [new podcast]

“Sort your face out!” he hissed, nudging me. I blinked and attempted to rearrange my features into something more socially acceptable.  Because every feeling I have leaves my brain, flutters around my head for a while, then settles onto my face like a drunken cranefly. Which means the person I’m talking to knows exactly what [...]

It’s big. It’s hairy. It’s coming down the stairs to smoosh your face into the floor. It’s the Pricing Gormagon!  People are asking me about pricing a lot lately and I understand why: we all find talking about price horrifying, right? Especially to clients. Let me guess: your palms get prickly and damp. Your heart [...]

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